Growing up is a difficult process, and it brings about some ambivalent feelings in Stephen.
In chapter 8, Barbara is with Stephen at Braemar. She finds the cork tip of a cigarette on the floor of the hideout and suggests smoking it. As they don't have matches, Barbara wants to open the trunk where Stephen and Keith hide their secret objects, but Stephen doesn't want to betray his friend showing Barbara their hidden possessions. However, Barbara gets around Stephen to do it by seductively leaning across him . The “weight and the softness of her and the movements of her body as she pulls the padlock back and forth” seem to make Stephen forget about his oath to Keith. He describes his feelings as a kind of “vertigo”, as if “there is no firm ground anywhere.”